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EH JUST SCRIBBLE
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i think i'm disassociating... i had a dream where i finally told my mother everything that happened between me and a certain individual. all the unwilling touches, the fighting, the harassment, everything. And i sobbed for what felt like hours. and my mother accepted me. upon hearing my phone go off, I opened my eyes to reveal i was in bed and a friend of mine was messaging me to make sure i was okay. i got up, silently cursed myself for thinking my mother would just accept me after so long and went about my day, hour by hour. I tried again to tell my mother everything that happened to me and this time she was too busy. the setting changed a few good times. i remembered the earlier texts and noticed i had notifications, and i could clearly tell the time and what the notifications consisted of. i don't remember too much of the next bit, but i know i was relying on an older boy to help me find my mother again. some girl probably around 17, tried to pick fights with me repeatedly. Eventually i went to some gross dirty bathroom on a public lot and had the living shit beaten out of me. my mother pulled me out and i felt immediately better, though i know i was missing teeth at that point. as things progressed i found a weird area which consisted of a lot of cardboard covering something, when i uncovered it i found an old picture that was ruined in november two years ago. i woke up in tears, nervous and shaky. my teeth still hurt. i went to the bathroom to wash my face and while drying my cheeks i felt something really warm in my mouth so i spit and my mouth had filled with blood. i know i had a cut a few moths back on the roof of my mouth, but i dont feel it as still open. i don't know whats going on but i'm going to try writing out my dreams to see if it helps me become more lucid.